Saturday, Feb. 16, 2002 -- 8:23 p.m.

Boyfriend is still away. argh.

I went grocery shopping last night. First I went to A&P but found the food was too expensive so I drove to Price Chopper and had a more wallet friendly time there.

Why is it that I find it difficult to pay 30 cents more for a loaf a bread but can easily spend $20 eating at a restaurant?

I took my groceries to Craig's to eat at a later date.

I sat around at his place, watching tv, going through picture albums. I was actually looking for wedding pictures (Craig has been married before) but I couldn't find any but the ones I saw were nice. I was snooping around his apartment but I couldn't find anything that I hadn't seen before. He has nothing to hide. argh. No secrets for me to discover. double argh.

This morning, I had to go with my mom to the mall to work. She couldn't drive because her back hurts so I drove. She couldn't open the store because her back hurt so I opened the store. She couldn't bend over at all because her back hurt so I had to bend and pick up things.

My mom, dad and my sister are all having back problems right now. It sucks for them. Luckily for me my back is A.OK. I was actually flaunting my good back in front of my parents asking them "is there anything you want me to pick up?" and when they said no I would pick up random things (lint) from the ground.

I finally went to pick up Craig's mail box key from Robert Q today after work. They had to hunt for it a bit but they finally found it. I bet Craig's mail is overflowing by now.

I think it's retarded that I miss him so darn much right now.

And no, it's not just the SEX although that's definitely something I miss. I miss holding his hand. I miss touching his face. I miss ... the way he laughs loudly at my stupidest jokes... the way I can say something totally out of the blue and he'll understand what I'm talking about. I miss staying in and watching a funny movie with him and laughing at parts that I would usually find unfunny but I find hilarious because he finds it hilarious. I miss the sex .

While I was at his apartment, I watched this PBS show on Obesity. It was really sad to see these 300, 500 pound people talking about their lives. I know how eating can get out of hand, where you feel like you have no control over what you put into your mouth. I was sitting there, eating two bigmacs and two orders of small fries while watching this show on obesity. Ironic.

It's so sad how we're surrounded by messages to eat eat eat. yet we are bombarded with images of the ideal skinny person we want, and should want to look like.

Oh yeah, I downloaded two great movies from Kazaa. The first was the count of monte cristo and the second was I am Sam (so sad, I cried several times) amazing. I would have willingly paid full price to go to I am Sam and I would have gone on a tuesday (cheap movie night) to see The count of monte cristo.

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